Listening to Wisdom

How do you decide which book to buy? Usually the cover or the title first gets my attention, and if it’s non-fiction I usually look at the table of contents with the names of the chapters and read the author’s bio to get a sense of the viewpoints the author may bring from his/her background. If the book lasts through those two tests then I open the book randomly once or twice to check the ease of reading and understanding, and to see if something jumps out that says, “Buy me! I have something you need! You will learn the wisdom and philosophy of the ages! Your life will be forever changed!” I must have a low threshold for gullibility because I believed four different books just this weekend! One is by Rob Bell, another is on traffic (yes, traffic as in cars and highways. I tried and tried to put it down but it was like a yo-yo rebounding into my hands) and another book on listening. The author, Michael P. Nichols, warns that we think we are better listeners than we really are, and I know there’s an art to listening that is beyond my abilities. When I opened the book to the first random page, bolded text stood out on the page:

“A listener’s emotional reaction seems inappropriate only as long as you can’t see his or her memory.”

Wow! The wisdom of the ages came pouring towards me! This statement felt like direct guidance for a recent discussion when it took several attempts to find some common ground before we could even begin our conversation. “Most failures of understanding are not due to self-absorption or bad faith, but to defensive reactions that crowd our understanding and concern.”

My prayer for the congregation?

Great God of compassion, You patiently listen to our petitions, our complaints, our dreams, our confessions, our joys, and our thanksgivings. We come before you and others with our whole lives, the fears and interpretations of our youth, the intentions of our thoughts confused with the words we choose to say, and the barriers we set that treat our vulnerabilities as treasures instead of scars. You listen to our heart and understand us better than we understand ourselves. Let us learn the art of listening, improving our relationship to others and dismantling our own obstructions. Let us be generous in listening frequently and being fully attentive. Listening is a gift we can give, deserved. Grace is a gift we receive, undeserved. Amen.